Namby, Queen of Gerving

Namby was a Gervinger who fought with Chut in their great war against Tuubuut. She did not fight for the glory of her domain, as the Chutters did; nor did she fight for their righteous cause, as you might guess. No, she fought because she wanted to leave Gerving. 

One day she asked a Chutter comrade, “What punishment does your ruler inflict on those who refuse to fight?”

And the Chutter stared at Namby in bewilderment for a moment, tapping their head in the appropriate manner, before replying, “Why would we refuse to fight? We love our ruler Gardragit, and she loves us.”

Then Namby saw the glory of Chutters in battle, and their pride in their domain, and she hoped that the war would never end. But the war did end, and Namby returned to Gerving. “I would be happier in Chut,” she said. 

“Do not say such things!” said her brother Devlon. “If Kak hears you slander his domain, he will make us murder you.” 

“Gardragit, ruler of Chut, would not be so cruel,” said Namby. 

“Then go live in Chut,” said her brother. But Namby would not go to Chut, for she believed she was not beautiful enough for that lovely land, and she was correct.

One day Kak decided to create a new holiday for his natha. “They are unhappy because they do not have enough holidays,” he thought. “Natha need holidays, even if they do nothing worthy of celebration.” So he declared a new holiday at the start of the year in which all natha must stand outside from sunrise til sunset in silent contemplation of his glory. Then the natha were dismayed, for they usually spent this time singing and playing dintoppe with their families. But since Kak decreed it they obeyed. 

“Gardragit would not demand such a holiday,” said Namby. “Her natha create their own holidays, and they include fun things like art and feasts.” 

“So go to Chut,” said her brother. But Namby touched her limp hair and said nothing.

Then all the natha were restless since they had not had time with their families. And without the dintoppe games there were no winners to become that year’s Kaklings, who enforced Kak’s laws. So there was much debate over what to do. “Let us play dintoppe tomorrow,” said one. “But that would be against Kak’s dintoppe decree,” said another. So the natha were in disarray, and throughout the following days they argued about who was breaking Kak’s laws, and what punishments were warranted, until the Gervingers were reduced to a screaming and quarreling mess. And Kak was outraged. 

“Is this how they thank me for granting them a holiday?” he thought. “I should have known that kindness would yield chaos.” So he ordered that half of his natha be randomly selected for dismemberment. And they drew pebbles from a pot, and all who drew a gray pebble had their hand chopped off. And the hands were hung from the homes of their former owners. 

“Gardragit would not dismember her natha,” said Namby, clutching her bloody stump. 

“Then go to Chut,” said her brother. But Namby looked at her mutilated arm and said nothing. 

Then she was filled with rage, and she met with the other one-handed natha, and they discussed their dissatisfaction. “We need not be unhappy,” said Namby. “We can make this domain a lovely place to live, like Chut. But not while Kak rules us.” And the natha were afraid to betray their ruler, but they were also afraid of losing their other hands while obeying him, so they chose treason.

Then Namby arranged a celebration of Kak. And on the appointed day all the one-handed Gervingers gathered in the holy square, and beat their drums, and sang the hymns, and danced in sacred light. When Kak heard this he cried, “What racket is this? I did not decree a celebration.” So he rushed out of his mansion in a rage. 

But when he reached the square all the natha cried, “Praise our beautiful ruler!” And they danced his favorite dance. Kak had never seen such ardent worship, and he was so overwhelmed that he wept. “Do not cry, Kak,” said Namby, “for we love you. We would be honored if you stood among us so we can perform proper worship.” 

“After all this time,” thought Kak, “I have finally become a good ruler.” So Kak delightedly danced to the center of the square, and all the natha surrounded him and beat their drums. “This is a strange beat,” said Kak. 

“It is a new rhythm,” said Namby, “for our renewed faith.” 

Then they danced toward him, shrinking the circle. “You are getting quite close to me,” said Kak. 

“Yes,” said Namby, “we feel closer to you, now that we are freed from our treacherous hands.”

And then the natha danced even closer until they were touching Kak. And no natha was allowed to touch Kak. So he said, “This is too much! You may not feel my holy form.” 

“Then we shall withdraw,” said Namby. And all the natha held tightly to Kak and withdrew, tugging his body in every direction, until the screaming Borgokog was pulled into a million pieces. Then the Gervingers cheered, and their two-handed neighbors came to see what was about. And when they saw Kak splattered across the domain they were aghast. 

“Do not be afraid,” said Namby, “for the tyrant Kak can harm us no longer. From now on I shall be your queen, and rule benevolently, and Gerving will be even happier than Chut.” And the natha made a crown with Kak’s bones and teeth and placed it on Namby’s head. And that is how the natha Namby became queen of Gerving.